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I am a cloth diapering, breastfeeding, cosleeping, baby led weaning, extended rear facing, eco conscious, married mommy to two beautiful children. They have changed my view on the world we live in. It is now my number 1 goal to make it the best I can for them to grow up in. I find myself always rethinking how I want to live my life and often feel like sharing my findings and thoughts with others. So I guess here's my chance :o) I will talk about topics that interest me. If you dont like them or dont agree, well... there's nothing much I can do!

Sunday, February 23, 2014

My first day being "away" from my boy.

As I sit here in our rocking chair, nursing my son to sleep, I look back on our day and realize neither one of us really enjoyed it. Other than a quick fundraising meeting this morning, I spent the whole day in the kitchen cooking and preparing future meals to store in our big freezer. I asked my sister to come over and hangout with the kids since I knew I'd be busy. Well I was too busy. And I won't be spending another day like this for a while. 

With Keegan gone on his two month deployment, I find myself needing easy meals since it is difficult to prepare a large meal with two children running around near me. I decided to give Once A Month Meals a try. Great site with tons of recipes. When you become a member, you have access to detailed shopping lists, food preparation tasks, as well as a timeline for your big cooking day. I had 2 menus that I had planned on tackling today. Things went alright. I didn't make enough mashed potatoes and a muffin recipe totally flopped and I only made about half of what I had planned but that was ok. 

What wasn't ok was not being there for the kids. Abigail was ok since she doesn't need my attention for the whole day but my little Zachary, well he definitely missed his mama. Although he kept coming in and out of the kitchen and laughed ad played all day, I still couldn't get down and interact with him when he came to see me. I'd often ask my sister to come get him since it wasn't entirely safe for him to be around the hot oven. I believe I took two or three instances to sit for a minute and quickly nurse him since I knew it had been a while. That was all his real interaction with me all day long and even then, it didn't last very long.

So here we are passed their bedtime and Zachary is simply sad. All he wants is to be held by me. So that's what we're doing. I got changed in my pjs quickly so that there was no reason for our cuddles to stop as we go from the rocking chair to our big bed where we will both sleep cuddled up to one another and breastfeed several times during the night. I still have a lot of work to do downstairs in the kitchen but it can wait until tomorrow. And even then, each meal preparation will be spaced out with lots of genuine interaction with the kids. 

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